too self-restrained?

I was told that I'm too self-restrained and that shouldn't be the case. I ought to speak up and say whatever I want to say, whatever I have to say. I suppose the statement holds certain truth in it but for this observation to have come from someone whom I don't have much contact with.. I begin to wonder.. Is this such an obvious trait of mine that makes it so easily identifiable??

Then again, I start thinking about the difference between self-control and self-restrain. How do you draw the line between these? I always thot I was jus exhibiting self-control but apparently it doesn't appear to be so to others.

Take for example when I'm out drinking with friends. Does the fact that I don't drink till I'm high/drunk like most other friends do make me a self-restraining individual? Rather the truth is I can't get high. The moment I have more drinks than what I can handle, I get drunk, the kind where I'll puke then sleep. So, I don't go over my limits simply because I've witness the unsightly scene of girls puking all over themselves and their friends having to pick up after them. Of course friends have told me its alright to get drunk once in a while, since everyone's just out to have fun. I know that and I've certainly been drunk before, just not with this grp. Another matter is that alcohol make me feel so much more 'sober' and aware of my own feelings and thoughts after imbibing one too many drinks... you just lose all will to suppress those hidden feelings.. the result is either you end up partyin like someone who's crazy in order to drown those or you just break down crying.. I've done both before, and enjoyed neither.. So in a way, I feel that I am just exhibiting self-control yet on the other hand, suppressing of feelings make tink its self-restraining...

There was an incident lately that caused a misunderstanding between 2 frens. Certain thoughts crossed my mind but I din want to pursue these and get to the bottom of the matter because whatever the truth might be, it isn't something I would want to know. Hence, my decision was not to complicate matters and stay out of the entire episode. However, the someone told me that I'm too self-restrained once again. Both are my friends, I only wished for the misunderstanding to somehow be forgotten over time, than to have the truth throw some unknown surprises at me! I have to take a neutral stance and cannot take sides since both are my friends and rather than jeopardizing my friendship with either one, what I hope to achieve is to help reconcile the 2 of them. By not having an opinion makes me a self-restrained individual?

Perhaps those ain't very good examples. I see myself as self-restrained especially when I'm with my colleagues. I don't talk much because I ain't sure when and what I say is not going to sit well with anyone. Not to say my colleagues are such sensitive people but just that its really different compared to being in my ex-firm. My current environment is probably a much better reflection of what a workplace is like. I haven't learnt the art of communicating the way I should in such an environment, hence I choose to watch and learn and progress slowly. My colleagues can call me quiet for all they like but it beats having them repeat all the stories for decades to come.

Yes, I am self-restrained. There are a lot of things which I don't say simply because of FEAR. Not knowing what will happen after I say certain things, I just simply don't say them or just state the opposite. That's just the silly side of me at work. Sometimes, I think too much of what the outcome might be and not wanting to be faced with a negative result, I keep things to myself. I really ought not to be like this, since you never know the outcome till you've tried. Moreover, life is too short for regrets. What if the outcome is good instead? This is something which I have to do something about... so do tell me when I'm too self-restrained and remind me constantly k!

Its been said that only true friends are frank to you. I've found another true fren =)