Struck me hard

Bro stayed over with the little one over the weekend.. While lazing in bed, just commented to him that my table's really messy (ie. can't see the table actually).. his reply was, "is it? but you're even messier!"

Alright, he probably meant it in the appearance sense since I refused to get out of bed and just continued lazing.. but his words struck me hard cos I really feel that life's in a mess right now.. although perhaps somewhat in an organised mess.. but its still a mess..

sighz.. Ain't making much sense here.. shall go continue packing instead..

Murphy's Law

Whatever can go wrong, will go wrong..

I was kinda bumming at work for about a week plus.. literally not doing anything much except surfing the web.. but as my leave draws closer.. I get busier! which is always the case.. On training for the past 2 days.. which leaves me with 3 working days this week.. and I've got couple of datelines.. arrggghhh!

I can now only look forward to hopping onto the jet plane next tues nite, and head for the Land of the Rising Sun! doubt I'll have the time to come up with a proper itinerary as I had planned to.. let's hope all the years of Japanese lessons will pay off when I'm there... really can't wait to go!!

Calls for joy.. But...

Mid-year performance review was sometime in end July last year.. was just discussing with a fren from another dept and we concluded that due to the financial turmoil, there won't be one this year. But we were so wrong...

Was called into boss's room tdy not knowing what to expect. Then he passed me the letter. I was surprised that there was a mid-year salary review! Well, I didn't read the letter carefully, only zoomed in on the nos. first. So my boss asked which item I was shocked about. Read the letter carefully, only to realise that I got a promotion too! I literally went "HUH" in front of my boss in disbelief! I wasn't expecting a salary increment, much less a promotion. What more, I had just been promoted earlier in the year. Its just too fast!

The entire promotion and pay increment thingy didn't really sink in. I was more worried than happy. Ya, I get more money now.. but then, it comes with a lot more responsibilities and stress as well! I told my boss frankly that I ain't sure if I'm ready to fill into the position. It might've been a tad too fast.. Also, its gonna be difficult to manage expectations of ppl both inside and outside the dept.. then again, colleagues were telling me that to begin with, I shdn't have joined the dept at the rank of analyst.. jus that my boss couldn't override HR's decision.. so assuming I had joined as an associate instead, then my current rank matches with the time spent.. but ppl out there won't know the story behind it.. and thing is, I really dont' feel that I'm ready to be independent! sighz.. the amount of stressssssss!

This promotion didn't really come at the right time.. Just when I realised that I gotta take betta care of my health and pay more attention to work-life balance instead of working myself to death, the bar has just been raised for me. How to relax??? But boss said its either now or yr-end.. and he feels that since I have met the criteria now, he just pushed me up.. I actually wasn't expecting any promotion prob for another 2 years.. so can you imagine the immense pressure I feel right now!!!!

Sep 6 - 4th Anniversary

Angela's wedding was on Sat Sep 6, the exact same date, 4 years back when we joined the firm! Pure coincidence.. So after the wedding dinner at Harbour Front, we hopped across to St James..

Time definitely has wings!! its already been 4 years since we joined the work force.. except for me and sean, the rest are still with the firm.. they're good to last this long.. or maybe max's curse was too strong.. before he left for aussie, he toasted us to 2 years with the firm, to await his return.. and that nite, he toasted the others to another 2 more years with the firm, till his bond ends.. lol..

Packing

My place is due for upgrading works in the coming week. Workers are gonna come in and make a mess of the place.. so my ever great daddy started packing things away neatly so as to minimise the amount of dust collected over these items.. he inspired me to spring-clean my room at the same time as well..

twenty-plus years and i've accumulated quite a huge load of stuff.. things which I once thought were useful, now seem nothing more than junk.. and I wonder why I had bothered to keep them back then.. i tossed out quite abit of stuff.. prob an equivalent of 4-5 A4 boxes worth of stuff..

as I packed my room, I started to think.. this packing of my room is somewhat akin to me packing up my feelings.. tossing out all those that are nothing more than junk now.. keeping only those worthy of being kept.. so as I pack and toss.. I began feeling a sense of peace and a tinge of happiness.. its been very long.. and its high-time I tossed away all the unnecessary.. to allow myself to move on.. things which I use to hold so dear could one day become nothing more than junk.. where I don't even think twice about throwing them away.. how sad is this? makes me ponder if there's permanence in anything in this world to begin with?

no matter how I know its time to move on.. its difficult.. it took years before I was able to view precious things as junk.. I don't expect to be able to just forget everything overnight.. but at least I know that its possible, just a matter of time..